The Reluctant Unschooler and a Great Ebook

I read a book on parenting this morning.  In it I was encouraged to.....

Think of our children as aliens?

Say yes as often as possible?

Wha?

You can check out my review of this book at

The Reluctant Unschoolerr is a burgeoning blog dealing with our experiment in unschooling.

Quiet Times In Loud Households

    Sounds like an oxymoron, doesn't it?   If you have little ones, or lots of littles and middles and bigs, you know just how loud things can be and what a challenge it is to have a quiet time with the Lord.

    Yet we are called to have quiet time with Lord each day.  To begin in the Word and spend time alone with Him in praise and prayer.

    This eludes me.  Not that I like to sleep in, I am by God's blessing a morning person (much to the dismay of most of my family.)   It's just that some mornings I cannot get up early enough for some of the children.

  And truthfully, if I did get up, what would I do?  Sure, I could work on my 90 day Bible reading plan, but I wanted more direction.  I knew something eluded me as to my time with God.

     A class at church helped.  A Twitter group and blog, Maximize Your Mornings helped with accountability.  But then I happened upon a book called "Quiet Times In Loud Households" and knew this was for me.   Written by Kimberly Eddy who blogs at Joyfulmomma, it was just what I needed.

   First of all, it was practical.  Second it was written by a mom who has been there.  With five children who came back to back, she has been in the trenches and knows the struggle to get most anything accomplished.

     Second of all, she has a heart for her children and knew that "her" time with God should and would spill over into the discipling of her family.

     Third, and most importantly, she was real.   She has opened up her life and shown her own shortcomings. Oftentimes we may feel that we cannot possibly attain such a devoted spiritual life, disciple our children, submit to our husbands, serve God...the way some authors describe it.   Not so, with Mrs. Eddy.

    I want to share with you some of the wisdom she talks about:

•  Her desire for wanting practical advice for raising children in the Lord and the Bible's role in that.

            "If God felt it were in our best interest as parents, He'd have written us a 2000 page tome chronicling exactly how to raise perfect children.  He's God, so He could do that.  However, He gave us the Bible, full of principles to govern our olives, including principles on parenting, but not a lot of specific details.  Why?  
                 I believe it's because He wants us, as parents, to stay on our knees in prayer, crying out for wisdom and grace for each days' task, and because He wants us to view each of our children as unique individuals He created them to be."  (Emphasis mine.)

• Knowing that God is available to us at any time of the day...and night.To live a devotional lifestyle (not just for a set time in the mornings!) "...a mistaken idea that a devotional time is one event in our day, instead of a lifestyle God is calling us to." 
• "Children need to see mother having a devotional life in order to have a model to follow."
• "In being an example, we need to be examples of a devotional life, rather than feeling the need to show the children how religious mom is.What you are trying to convey is how much mom needs the Lord, not how much the Lord needs mom."
•  "They need to see moms who run to the Lord (not the phone or email) with their problems."
• Not to be a hypocrite.  "What am I going to show my children that a Christian does when a Christian messes up?"

Other topics include:  Mothering On Sundays....Serving (In and out of seasons).....Family Devotions..

    I had the opportunity (via Twitter) to show my appreciation for her book; thanking her for being practical and  genuine.  I let her know I was going to write about it.  (How could I NOT..it was such an eye opening book for our family!) and she offered a $2 coupon off anything in the store.

     Just go to the Joyful Momma Store, make your selection and put TMMETZ11 in the coupon code field.  This offer is good until August 31st.  (I also have, but have not finished reading, two of her Ebooks:  "Momma's Guide to Thriving On One Income"  and "Momma's Guide to Growing Your Own Groceries.")

   You may find Mrs. Eddy on Twitter @KimberlyEddy and on Facebook Joyful Momma Publishing.  I hope you too will be blessed by her wisdom.

I Did It! (And I'll Probably Do It Again)

    Sixty-six books, 1,189 chapters...in 90 days?   It's possible.  I've known people who have done it many times.  But for me, it took 564 days.

   What am I talking about?  The Bible of course.  Specifically reading the Bible from beginning to end.

    Reading the entire Bible from beginning to end was something I had never done before.  In late December, 2009, I had the desire to read through the entire Bible.   I love to make personal goals for myself, especially those that help to improve my walk, and especially at that time of year.

   So I hooked up with a group of people on Twitter who were going to read the Bible in 90 days. (Isn't it great when the internet is used for the glory of God?)   I printed off a sheet to mark the divisions and waited excitedly for January 1, 2010 to roll around.

    I was of course behind in the first few days.   The first 90 days came and went and I had barely started.  The second, third, fourth, fifth and even sixth 90 days passed by and still I trudged along. I used three different Bibles; two different translations.  I read during idle times by downloading YouVersion on my phone.  I listened on my phone as I took walks.   I listened to Bible Gateway's audio Bible as I rested or sewed or did something with my hands.    I am a BIG note taker but didn't do more than underline a few key words or verses.   I also did not often even look at commentary, maps, biographies.  What I DID do was try to share daily with the children something interesting that I had read that day.

 As I read, I learned a few things about this process:

• Reading the entire Bible in 90 days is a LOT of daily reading!  We're talking entire books in a day.  Now I consider myself a fast reader; I comprehend well.  But the Bible is something to savor, not gobble down.
• Reading that much in a day was frustrating.  Having been doing a small group Bible study with Community Bible Study for the past five years, I learned to dig deep into passages, reading cross references, analyzing, synthesizing, applying.  Reading so fast doesn't leave time for this.
• I obviously needed to learn and practice self discipline in reading daily.

    Mind you, I WAS reading my Bible.  During this 90 days+ extended period of time, I:

• Finished the second half of an in depth study of Revelation
• Finished a 30 week study of Daniel, 1 and 2 Thessalonians, 1 and 2 Peter
• Did an overview of the history of the Old Testament with the children.
• Looked up passages with the family and discussed.
• Memorized scripture.
• Previewed and reviewed sermons

  So, what did I get out of reading the entire Bible? 

• It was AMAZING to see God's love for us and plan for salvation from beginning to end.
• It was WONDERFUL to read again those books I had studied in depth.
• It was BEAUTIFUL to read the verses that I had heard many times or had memorized in their context.
• It was THRILLING to read the Gospels and see the harmony from four different viewpoints.

Would I do it again?  Yes.  Probably not so fast.  Probably in a different way. Probably with and to the children.  But yes, most definitely.

So what's next?   I am planning to read Romans.  I've always wanted to dig deep into Romans.  Since our family is not doing CBS this year (as of this writing..you never know ;) ), I feel I can and NEED to dig deep.   I borrowed from the church library for a long, long, they-called-me-because-they-wanted-it-back time so I finally bought Rick Warren's Bible Study Methods at my favorite Christian used book store.  I am going to pick one to use as I study.  Probably one that I can teach the children.

 

Captive

  
  In an effort to continually be improving myself, conforming to the image of Christ, I have discovered that it begins with my very thoughts.    And *gasp*God knows them. 


Psalm 139:1-2
 O LORD, you have searched me and you know me.  You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar.  




    Our thoughts lead to our actions and our actions are a witness to a watching world.    


     This has led me to the desire to want to explore more closely 2 Corinthians 10:5:  "We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ." 




     It isn't just enough to have right actions, I must control my very thoughts, motives.  In other words, search my heart with every thought and deed.
  
    This isn't easy....  Genesis 6:5:  "The LORD saw how great man's wickedness on the earth had become and that every inclination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil all the time." 


   Isn't that us in a nutshell?   So are we doomed to our sin nature? Our sin nature holds us captive in a dark place.  The word "captive" means to be in bondage, enslaved.  But can we not also be enslaved to Christ if we are in a saving relationship with Him?
  
    Ephesians 6:6 tells us to be like "....slaves of Christ."  So instead of being at the whim and mercy of a fallen world we turn it over to Him.


 And guess what?  I cannot do it alone.  Each time my thoughts turn negative, slanderous, hurtful, prideful, I call on God and He answers me:


Philippians 4:8    


Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.


   It will be an act of the will.  To purposefully turn thoughts towards Him.  Asking Him to always be showing me His perspective, to turn my heart.


   This may mean loving as He commands me to love.  This may mean knowing His love for me and my identity in Him.  This may mean facing some ugly truths about myself.  


     But, "..we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him and have been called according to his purpose."  Romans 8:28.


     In essence, it's all good.

Homemakers Challenge: The Master Bedroom

     This week's challenge was to spruce up the master bedroom.  I had been itching to do so.  Among the many messy things in my house, the bedroom is one that I have almost complete responsibility for.  Most of the things in there are mine and I can make easy decisions regarding them while cleaning.

     I started this unbeknownst to this challenge a few weeks ago when I finally, after three years living in this house, cleaned out my drawers.   I had been wearing the same few pairs of undies because the others were so far deep in my drawers that I would never find them.  Even opening a drawer was enough to cause a muscle strain.   I have now enjoyed my clean drawers (an more varied choice of other "drawers") for over a week now.  

    I was ready for more.

    Especially when my room looked like this!

The biggest challenge I face in keeping my room tidy is truly other people.   The littlest ones like to cart toys and other trinkets from other rooms.  Children play in there with the baby and leave their toys.   It is where we keep the baby's clothes, shoes, diapers, wipes, jackets so when older children are in there to get what the need to care for the baby, putting things back is not their strong suit.  

And then there is the husband. He is rather neat, but we do not see untidy in the same way.  This is why his side of the room is farthest from the door :).

One favorite thing about my bedroom is the sliding glass doors and the view from it.  We have a small tree to one side and a view of the mountains beyond that.  Another thing I love is our new bed.  It's lovely, sturdy and comfy.  It's where hubby and I can be (mostly) alone together.  We have some of our best conversations (read:  private and uninterrupted) in our bedroom. 

I love the attached bathroom with a tub that has jets!  

 I also love the privacy.  It is my space away.  But I also love that the babies (two so far at this house) have had basinettes and cribs in our room.   They are just a few steps away from cuddling with Mommy and Daddy.

Our room is a meeting place for private conversations.  Sometimes they are disciplinary in nature but mostly when our oldest wants to share her day or discuss something with us.

Our room is baby central with wipes, diapers, clothes, blankets and whatever you need to care for or entertain a baby.

Our room is where we keep household information.  Our desk holds our budget and other important information.

Our room is where we work.  I love to do my CBS study on my bed.  I love to write, read, study, blog all from the comfort of my bed.

What I would like to see done, I think I did it.   We are embarking on a declutter mode at our house and getting rid of things we do not absolutely love, so I convinced my husband to sell his collection of hula girls.  He was perfectly fine with it. 

I think I would also like to put a clock on the wall near my bed.  Perhaps some more wall hangings.   I would also like to shampoo or replace the carpet.

My encouragement to others wanting to change their bedroom space is to get rid of things.   Decide what is necessary.  The things you keep in your room are the things you need and are willing to look at and/or dust.

    And so without further ado...the final product:

Cozy, isn't it?

 What you will see: 

 A new bed.  Is that cheating?  It was already planned before this challenge, honest.

What you will not see:

I didn"t get to wipe down the crib or the walls/basebords behind the baby's cabinet, crib, desk and bookshelf.

A clean carpet...didn't get to it.

A clean closet...didn't get to it.

Clean blinds and sliding glass window.

I will finish some of the unfinished jobs this next week.  Sapped energy from sickness curbed my enthusiasm and ability.

Can't wait until next week's challenge.

Homemaker's Challenge: It's About Time

    I am all about the schedule.  

    I'm pretty sure I have always been the schedule type of person.  I recall scheduling homework and chores while in high school (though you will have to confirm this with my mother).  As a college student I found a schedule very helpful as I cared for my husband, home and small child.

   As our family grew from three to eleven in ten short years I found the schedule to be a necessity.  I read every book and blog I could to improve on my schedule making skills to make it work for a large family.  

  This is what I have learned:

The schedule is necessary.

The schedule is fluid.

The schedule serves us, we do not serve the schedule.

The schedule should be blown off now and then.  

The schedule is necessary for young and old alike.  The littlest ones feel comfort to know what comes next.  They need to know there are times for play, times for rest (to avoid like the plague) and of course times for food!  

So when the 5 year old asks what's for dinner right after breakfast, you KNOW he knows dinner is coming!

And when the 3 year old dawdles at lunch by eating her food morsel by morsel you KNOW she knows nap time is coming!

The schedule brings them peace and stability The oldest children can look at our home schedule and plan their own things within it and learn the vital skill of scheduling themselves.  They also learn the fine art of consideration of the family over the wants of the individual.  

When the family has a schedule, there is peace.

The schedule is and should be fluid.  It should not be so rigid that it cannot be changed to meet the needs of the family.   It is not a hard taskmaster, but rather a guide to the ebb and flow of the days.  However, the more the schedule stays the same the more predictable it will be.  Though it is important to make allowances for the joys and troubles life brings (like the time we had to do laundry for 11 in the TUB!  Or the day we got our horse!).   The schedule serves us in our needs and goals as a family,  we do not serve the schedule.

My advice?  Start small.   Hit the highlights of meals, basic cleaning and school/homework.  When these are set in place, add more of those things you want to accomplish a little at a time, allowing a few weeks for learning curve.  Read books like Managers Of Their Homes, Managers of Their Chores, Large Family Logistics, FlyLady's Sink Reflections.  

Our daily schedule these days is as follows:

Personal chores

Breakfast and clean up

1 hour of house cleaning

School

lunch prep, eat and clean up

School

Free or more house cleaning

Afternoon chore time/dinner prep

Dinner and clean up

Showers

Free or read or tv

Bed

Sure I have times set for all of these and yes, there is a bit more to it than this.  (For instance, Dad likes to do a Bible time during breakfast) But what happens in these general sections of our day is always changing based on the needs of the family, what's working and what isn't as well as the maturity of what the children are able to do.

Our weekly schedule these days is a follows:

Monday: WHB, fill laundry soap, make laundry soap, socks, ironing, mending, take trash out, Girls have dance, Mom works out

Tuesday: clean basement and/or zone cleaning, Weight Watchers/work out, office day, shower night

Wednesday:  deep clean kitchen, price book, AWANAS, Mom works out

Thursday:  mini WHB, CBS, errands, Dad works out, Shower night, one on one w 12yo

Friday:  Mom's day out/Dad teaches science, pizza night, movie night.

Saturday: Big breakfast, Saturday chores, clean church, Family Fun, Church prep, game night or date night, showers

Sunday:  Church, clean fridge & eat leftovers, do something active, watch Biggest Loser as a family.

Over the years I have kept my routine written down somewhere.  Sometimes it was public for all to see, and sometimes I kept it in a control journal (home binder, what have you).  Our basic routine has been so well ingrained that the children know that 7 am is breakfast (ready or not!), 4 pm is time for afternoon chores and 8 is bedtime.  

Recently I revamped my home binder to half size and made a carrier that hold it and my school binder so I can take it with me wherever I go.  If there is any information the family needs, I put it on the dry erase board.   The school schedule is listed on the dry erase board downstairs.

Finally, the schedule is meant to be blown off now and then.   As homeschoolers, we do not have snow days, but rather its-a-beautiful-day-let's-go-to-the-zoo/park/ice arena/movies/friend's house/picnic days.  This is when we blow off all but what is essential like feeding the animals and humans.  The work:  schoolwork, housework will be there tomorrow.  It won't be so far gone that it cannot be fixed in a day.   Because the next day, it's back to the schedule.

Wordless Wednesday

Wordless Wednesday